I survived sex trafficking. Now, prayer is helping me heal.
Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash
Written by a former Courage House resident, whose identity will remain anonymous for privacy reasons. Currently, she is pursuing a college education and her dream is to become a nurse.
Click here to read the originally published article on American Magazine online.
"When I was exposed to sex trafficking, my view of the world changed. I saw a lot of things I shouldn’t have, and I felt alone and exhausted."
Then one day, my half sister saw me on the streets trying to catch a date to make money. She called law enforcement so I could get out of the situation; I was too young to realize what I was doing. After she called the police, the officers pulled over the madam I was with, who was looking after me; the pimp who ran the trafficking operation was attending his daughter’s birthday. She went to jail for pimping and pandering.
The police officer took me to Child Protective Services, and I was assigned a social worker from the county. As my social worker got to know me and started looking for a placement for me, she asked me if I would like to live at Courage House, a group home that helped minors who were victims of human trafficking. Immediately I was excited and anxious because I did not know what to expect.
To be able to live at Courage House, girls had to go through an interview process. The therapist or administrator would ask questions like “Why are you interested in living at Courage House?” or “Are you able to commit to not having a cell phone when living here?” After they are done questioning the girl, the interviewer gives the girl’s social worker a call to let them know if they have been approved or not. If the girl is approved, she will pack her belongings and arrive at Courage House.
Before I went to live at Courage House, I did not know anything about God. My biological father was an atheist who told me that God did not exist. I did not get the chance to learn about God or talk about him because my father did not want my siblings and I speaking about him. I just assumed he did not exist because of the way my father acted when someone mentioned God. If someone spoke about God, my father would get mad and would not speak to that person for a while until he felt like he could forgive them. Because of his negative reaction, I was afraid that my father would judge and disown me if I asked others about God. Even so, I was still curious about God, and I wanted to know more.
At Courage House we had mentor nights where residents could meet with mentors for spiritual direction and to talk freely about God. I started attending church and listening to worship music. Initially, worship music was the one thing that helped me heal because it allowed me to escape reality and spend time with God. It also educated me about the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
Another thing that helped me was writing to God about my struggles and problems. Writing allowed me to realize that he was listening to me, that he would be by my side at all times. I learned to be thankful in life and not take things for granted. Even to this day, I pray for people because God has taught me to give grace to others when I get upset with them. Sometimes the best thing I can do for someone is to pray for them and let God handle the situations that I can not control because he is the one who can change people.
As my relationship grew with God, I learned to love myself, to make decisions for myself and to stand up for myself. I am no longer afraid to speak about God to my father, and I am not ashamed to hide my relationship with God. One day, I hope my siblings see how amazing God is, too. I like introducing my friends to God by teaching them how to read the Bible, listening to worship music and teaching them to pray for people. I have learned to be patient with God and work hard while maintaining a relationship with him. I know he will not let me down and that he is guiding me on the path he wants for me, even though it may take some time to see results.
"As my relationship grew with God, I learned to love myself, to make decisions for myself and to stand up for myself."
Being able to experience God through prayer has changed my life. I have learned to respond with love instead of lashing back; I have learned my worth and strength; I have learned to not allow negativity back into my life. I let God fight the battles for me.
"I have learned my worth and strength"
Though I have escaped from the world of sex trafficking, I still face challenges. But every day I am growing and healing because I have let God into my life. I have not looked back since.
If you or someone you know is a victim of human trafficking, please call the National Human Trafficking Hotline at 888-373-7888 for social and legal services.